Chile Day 14 - Golly, It Rains More

It rained all last night and all day today. The same storm fell as snow at higher altitudes, so the mountains were covered in thin fairy dust for most of the morning. Predictably, all of the outfitters cancelled their rafting operations and spent the day playing spades. The real kick in the teeth is that exchile rafted the legendary bridge-to-bridge route yesterday, so if I had made my bus connection on Tuesday I could have seen some of the gnarliest class V whitewater in the world at its peak. Instead, I didn't even have someone to play cards with. My only accomplishment for the day was getting my elf rogue up to level 20 in the stupid palmpilot game which has been occupying more of my time than I'd prefer.

I spent most of the morning inside watching the rain. I did change hotels (yet more dangerously low ceilings) and met a couple from Colorado who are also down here for the non-existant rafting. They're both river guides and their local connections are just as bummed by the situation here as I am. (Perhaps moreso - it's their livelihood, after all.) The exchile guidehouse has a sticker in the window which says "Pray For Rain". I think we can stop praying now.

Eventually, I became so frustrated that I set out into the rain. The drenched snackcracklepopadendrons were mournfully silent. To paraphrase the immortal wisdom of Donald Rumsfeld, you hike with the weather you have, not the weather you wish you had. The cheezy tourist map of town showed a pleasant-looking path to a rocky outcropping at the confluence of three valleys. The photos of the area always show some happy backpacker on this rock surrounded by lakes, cliffs, and blue sky. After climbing a few miles through cow fields (and their attendant landmines) I reached the top and saw... nothing. With the rain and fog, I had about 20 feet of visibility. I think I saw a sheep, but I'm not sure. Despondent and wet, I climbed downward through the sluice of slippery mud and slipperier cow patties. No sooner had I reached the access road than the clouds lifted, the rain slowed, and the fog burned off. When the view of the valley opened up, I worked very hard to suppress an enraged scream. This country is really toying with me. I'm sure of it. I feel like Job and I now even know the location of a nice dung heap should I feel like cursing God.

To continue the the biblical allusions, I'd also like to take issue with Noah's rainbow and its promise of hope. Elementary school girls everywhere draw rainbows with happy ponies, ballerinas, and princesses. They're supposed to be pretty, joyful, and colorful. I have come to see the rainbow as a weather system's middle finger, as if to say "look, I can make you wet and give you sunburn AT THE SAME TIME." Eric Cartman was right - I hate rainbows.

It's a bizzare paradox, but I am now so poor that I found myself eating dinner at the best restaurant in town. I finally located someplace that takes credit cards. The prices are extravagant for chile, but rather like a usual night out back home. By either standard, it's better than another gristle empanada. At dinner I met Jozef and Kristine from Belgium, who let me pay for their dinner with my credit card and redirect the cash my way. Combine that with a dollar/peso currency exchange courtey of the colorodans, and I might have enough to get me back to an ATM in puerto montt. Thanks guys!

I'd also like to thank everyone who responded to my plea for reading material suggestions. I downloaded almost every idea and they're sitting on my memory card, just waiting to be read. I'd particularly like to thank Mary for suggesting some Ambrose Bierce. That man makes H.L. Mencken look like Mr. Rogers. All I have to do in order to feel better is to surround myself with people whose attitudes are even more foul than mine.